Dear Crone,

For a couple months now, I've been thinking about going low contact with my parents once I move out.

They have made me cry more times than I can count.

I love them but will I be an ungrateful brat for going low contact?

Anonymous

Dear Anon,

If you need space, you can take it.

Low contact doesn’t require a declaration; you can simply step back.

Don’t be the first to reach out, and assess whether you respond when they do.

If they ask why you’re being distant, you can decide how to explain it to them.

You can be grateful and distant.

Directly,

The Crone

Dear Crone,

I’m 15 and I really want a girlfriend but I can’t just walk up to a girl and ask her out cause I’m not particularly fond of getting jumped.

Do u have any idea on how find a queer-friendly space?

Thanks so much :)

Anonymous

Dear Anon,

Honestly, I would start with Googling “queer-friendly youth spaces” as that can provide a good baseline.

I do want to recommend that you avoid Reddit communities and the like for now, as they most often are adult-oriented groups, and I want you in something age-appropriate.

Unless, of course, there’s a teen community.

For what it’s worth, this gets easier as you get older.

Encouragingly,

The Crone

Dear Crone,

I am gay, and my friends and family think that it is weird that I enjoy hetero romance novels.

Do you have any recommendations for how to deal with them (without demonic pacts or spellcraft)?

The Herald of Harold

Dear HoH,

I think what you’re experiencing is… empathy?

Objectively, a good thing!

Welcome to the wonderful world of well-meaning individuals who don't understand you.

Recommendations include earplugs, eye masks, and a good skincare routine.

Seriously, you don’t need to justify either your sexuality or the things you enjoy to people.

They can have an opinion, and you can have a TBR.

Directly,

The Crone

Hello dear Crone and Daniel,

I am torn on my feelings in my relationship.

I am in 3y relationship with a girl i love and we comunicate a lot, but i am still held back when it comes to talking about stuff, from the little things to the big things.

Am i just fearful of the response (i like you have been a child therapist for overgrown married children) or is comunication always this difficult even with someone you wholeheartedly trust?

Fede

Dear Fede,

Communication is difficult if you’re not used to communicating with someone you can trust.

This is the part where I recommend speaking to a professional, as you may need guidance in understanding why your initial response is so fearful.

It doesn’t mean you’re in the wrong, just that you have some things to work through.

And I’m sure your partner will be supportive of this process.

Gently,

The Crone

Dear Crone,

I am currently writing a book of my own and am contemplating whether or not to put a gay romance in between the 2 main characters, and what various character tropes I should consider including in my lineup of timetraveling (very much a bag of mixed fruit)disasters

C, literally just C, because that's what most people call me, no, you may not have my full name

Dear Literally Just C,

Anything but miscommunication.

Make them hate each other until one of them gets kidnapped.

Organize an arranged marriage to keep them separate.

Have them hold hands for the first time, but get interrupted by their friend.

Just make them communicate, please!

Emphatically,

The Crone

Dear Crone & Daniel,

I’m a 17y/o student, and I think I need 2 apologize to someone.

He didnt deserve the way I treated him, though he bullied me.

This has been ~10yrs in the making.

I wasnt fair 2 him when we met b/c he reminded me of my bff/bully from my old town.

I feel guilty for how I acted & want 2 get it off my chest, but I’m scared of what will happen if I do & I was even told not 2 by a counsellor b/c "he’s a boy & pro'ly doesn’t remember anyway" but it is eating away @ me.

Sry 4 formatting

A Mace Called Apologies

Dear Mace,

I think I have a personal beef with that counsellor as of this writing, but that’s besides the point.

You cannot predict his response, but if you have a way to contact him, I think it would be okay to write him a message.

It’s possible he doesn’t remember, or it’s possible he will really appreciate it.

The caveat here is that you have to be remorseful and not just attempting to assuage your guilt.

If you mean it, send it.

Otherwise, it can be okay to move on.

Honestly,

The Crone

Dear Crone,

I gave my husband an ultimatum of couples therapy or pack your shit and get out of my house.

He said he was done.

Then later said “no, I wanna do counselling even though I feel like we don’t need it.”

So here I am a week later and the more I think about it, I don’t know if I want counselling or I just want to kick his ass out.

But we have a daughter and two dogs.

Shouldn’t we try to make it work?

How long do we try?

I don’t know what to do.

Scared and Maybe Single Mom

Dear Maybe Single,

From my vessel’s experience, attempting to make a bad situation work is far more detrimental to your child than a clean break would be.

If we’re already at the “pack your shit part,” I think it’s time for that, especially if he’s going into couples’ counselling with the adamant belief that you don’t need it.

I don’t suggest the nuclear option often, but vacillating between refusing to do it and acquiescing is another way to keep you on the hook for the relationship.

Papers. Now.

Honestly,

The Crone

Hi Crone & Daniel!

I found out that my friends have had a separate group chat for about 5 months, and they’ve been saying some hurtful things about me.

One of them accidentally revealed it, and after an argument, he showed me the messages.

I genuinely can’t understand what I did to deserve this.

I’ve gone over every interaction without finding an answer.

They iced me out, so I can’t talk to them to get any closure.

I’m hurt, confused, and don’t know what to do.

Kindly,

Chocolate Spiders Only.

Dear Chocolate,

Unfortunately, this is the closure.

They don’t have an interest in being good friends, and while you did not receive a meaningful explanation, their refusal to give it to you is answer enough.

Sometimes, people just suck.

Sometimes, people are just bullies.

For whatever reason, you were the target, but now you can get out of there.

I’m sorry you went through this, and I really do recommend speaking to a therapist.

You can grieve these relationships while knowing you’ve made the right choice to cut them off.

We’re here for you.

Gently,

The Crone